#WHAT DO I THINK LOVE IS HOW TO#

The kind of love that you likely have had in your marriage, that you were comfortable with and that you felt your spouse was comfortable with.Р”Р„s a matter of fact, IРІР‚в„ўm pretty sure that he or she was comfortable with that kind of love. It has to come down to a more manageable kind of love. No love that intense can last a lifetime. Is your spouse consumed with that other person? Understand that being obsessed, or consumed with another person, is not the kind of love that lasts a lifetime. So if youРІР‚в„ўre wondering, does my spouse have that? Can I trust that theyРІР‚в„ўre just in limerence, and their new РІР‚СљloveРІР‚Сњ will be short lived? I canРІР‚в„ўt give you a definitive testРІР‚В¦ but I can tell you a few questions to ask yourself to see : Often people who fall madly in love with somebody else and want to leave a marriage for this new person, actually go into a state called РІР‚Сљlimerence.РІР‚Сњ Basically it just means theyРІР‚в„ўre infatuated.Р”Р„fter working with thousands of couples, many times, one or both of them were in limerence with other people (and we helped them put the marriage back together).

#2- Remember that this РІР‚СљloveРІР‚Сњmost likely has a short shelf life.

#WHAT DO I THINK LOVE IS HOW TO#

In other words, figure out how to reduce your pushes and how to increase your pulls, which IРІР‚в„ўll talk more about here. If you want to think of competition at all, think about you being in competition with you. So please stop viewing this person as your competition. Because when you do that, youРІР‚в„ўll start trying to be somebody that youРІР‚в„ўre not, and thatРІР‚в„ўs going to work against you. And even though you think somehow you have to РІР‚Сљout pullРІР‚Сњ them in their sense of being, what they are even more soРІР‚В¦ ThatРІР‚в„ўs not the case at all. You canРІР‚в„ўt control anything about him or her whatsoever. So please stop thinking about that other person. The good news is- you donРІР‚в„ўt have to compete with them. I canРІР‚в„ўt compete with her.РІР‚Сњ Or РІР‚СљHeРІР‚в„ўs handsome and rich, and IРІР‚в„ўm not handsome.

Be better than them.РІР‚СњР”В«ut what do you do if you canРІР‚в„ўt compete? You think, РІР‚СљSheРІР‚в„ўs 25. So naturally you might think РІР‚Сљ have to match them. In your case right now, itРІР‚в„ўs the fact that somebody else exists out there that they want to be with. Things that pull your spouse towards you (or towards someone else). IРІР‚в„ўm not saying itРІР‚в„ўs your fault that your spouse is gone, so just hear me out here. And the bigger those pushes becomeРІР‚В¦ the more likely that the spouse may leave. РІР‚СљPushesРІР‚Сњ are anything youРІР‚в„ўre doing in your relationship (whether you realize it or not), that is pushing your spouse away from you. You see, thereРІР‚в„ўs a basic principle we teach that we call pushes and pulls. You might think if he or she goes away, then that will solve the problem. No matter how hard it is, if you want to try to make your marriage work instead of get divorced, please donРІР‚в„ўt think of the other person as competition. #1- DonРІР‚в„ўt think of your spouseРІР‚в„ўs lover as your competition. There are 3 things IРІР‚в„ўve found that can help put your marriage back together in this situation (even if your spouse isnРІР‚в„ўt interested). So, what can you do to save the marriage if your spouse is in love with someone else? We know, because weРІР‚в„ўve been working with couples in situations like this for over a quarter of a century, and have found some proven methods that might work for your situation. On top of that, when you turn to your friends & family for adviceРІР‚В¦ they probably tell you to get a divorce. РІР‚СљIs there something wrong with me? Did I not fulfill you? Do I have some flaw thatРІР‚в„ўs so major that you want to get away from me?РІР‚Сњ YouРІР‚в„ўre in pain, youРІР‚в„ўre angry, and youРІР‚в„ўre questioning yourself. This person promised to spend a lifetime with youРІР‚В¦ and now theyРІР‚в„ўre with someone else. ItРІР‚в„ўs a shock to your system, and thereРІР‚в„ўs probably a ton of stuff running through your head right now. What do you do when you find out that your spouse is in love with someone else? Do you call it quits? Leave? Do you try to get them to fall back in love with you?

What do i think love is